Be Happy

"Happiness is not something ready made.  It comes from your own actions."

-Dalai Lama

When I made the decision to change the way that I live I chose to move towards happiness.  However, this proverbial pursuit of whatever happiness is has shown me that even though the word happiness can be defined, the feeling is an entity all its own and its definition depends purely on the seeker/possessor.  I don't believe that we stumble upon happiness or that what causes our despair now once fixed will result in immediate happiness (sure it will but its longevity is questionable).  No you can't just fall into happiness...it's a choice.  What you do determines whether or not you'll be happy.  You have to want happiness.  If you're broke today and about to lose your home winning the lottery may subdue your misery for some time but where there is light there is also darkness and distress is unfortunately always around the corner. You have to make an effort.  I am a believer in doing what's right, though I may not do right all the time.  You should strive to be good to yourself and to others.  Your happiness depends on you.  If you change, it will prompt change in your lifestyle, your friends, and your surroundings.  

It is during our darkest moments that we must focus to see the light.

-Aristotle Onassis

Be grateful for what you have even if it is very little not because it could always be worse but because you know it will get better.  Make your thoughts positive thoughts.  Everyday won't be a good day, it's just not possible or plausible but if even on those bad days you force yourself to focus on the positive things that are taking place in your life you'll be all the better for it.  Trust me, I was a very angry/sad person and though I will not dwell on my situation I have come a long way in this last year. Your despair, anger, or whatever you want to call it will hold you back if you let it.

"Seeing is deceiving,

Dreaming is believing,

It's okay not to be okay."

-Jessie J (Who You Are)

It's okay not to be okay.  You can not possibly be happy all the time unless there's some magical entity I don't know about.  It's not going to happen.  You could fake happiness but you're only hurting yourself.  When you feel angry, upset, sad, or miserable take the time to actually feel those feelings.  You do not have to dwell in them. Let them go after you've dealt with them.  Pain shouldn't last forever.  If you can't cope with what you feel then it's time to go seek professional help.  I say this with all the sincerity in my heart.  I don't think that depression or any feeling that may cause you to harm yourself or others is a laughing matter.  If you can't pull yourself up there are people who can help.  

Our happiness can't be found through any other means than ourselves.  Why not choose to be happy?  

Dealing with Tragedy

So this post is simply to offer some words of encouragement.  Today I received some devastating news.  After years of battling cancer my friend, Aliyah Howard, passed away.  It's always hard losing someone and this situation wasn't any easier.  She was an awesome person and being around her was always enjoyable.  She had been through a lot but she was the same unrelenting and fun person to the end.   She will be missed greatly but my memories of her will be cherished.  My prayers and thoughts go out to her family and friends as we all try to cope with this tragic loss.  

Sometimes life deals some pretty powerful blows whether it be death, poverty, or any other event and/or circumstance.  Resistance to the struggle is futile, there's no way around it you just have to go through it.  It's gonna be alright.  Allow yourself to feel however it is that you are feeling but don't dwell.  If you're angry be angry, if you're sad be sad, and if you're utterly devastated then you have every right to be.  Just go ahead and feel it then when the time is right (and trust me it's different for everyone) allow yourself time to heal.  Wounds heal slowly especially emotional wounds.  Take your time there's no rush.  People should understand and if they don't then you should evaluate your relationship with those people.  If you don't allow yourself to heal you'll never be as close to the former you that you were before (I say as close, because every tragedy changes us no matter how small it's a change and sometimes you just can't go back).  It's like breaking a bone, if that bone doesn't heal properly then you'll have some serious complications later.  So take your time....


I know that I haven't posted anything pertaining to 'My Active Prepared Life' but this week has been a very tough one for thus far.  I promise I will get back to those posts as soon as possible.

Thank you for reading.