My Active/Prepared Life: Sorting Through Confusion

So as I drank my cup of hot water this morning (yep hot water, I'll explain later) and my 'roommate' began talking to me about duality (he does this a lot) I thought to myself 'what is he talking about it's much too early for this and why is he always so complicated'? 

Granted most things are complicated, rarely is there any thing that is clean cut.  However, how are these complications helping you achieve happiness?  As far as I can see these complications have only served as excuses and have only caused you stress.  If you realize that things are complicated, great.  Everything is not black and white, awesome.  But how is this helping you to make better decisions?  It should be helping you to make better decisions because if it is not then it's just creating mess.

If when asked why you feel a certain way you answer with it's complicated then you're confused.  I would even go further to suggest that knowing how you feel isn't what you want.  That anguish that you feel has so long been a part of your life that you don't know how feeling any other way would make you feel.  It would be uncomfortable and often painful.  So 'it's complicated' is now an excuse to remain where you are.  Unless of course you really are confused and of course no one ever wants to admit that they are confused or that they may not know (be ignorant of) especially when speaking of oneself.  If you don't know you, who does?  Deep down I believe we know ourselves; we just don't disclose or we have repressed what we know because honestly we just don't like what we know or discover.  For this we are in confusion and we can not come out until we at the very least admit what we know to ourselves.

If when asked how you feel regarding a specific topic (example: religion/politics) and you reply it's complicated then honestly honey you're confused.  Admit it.  You're confused and it's going to take a little more self-evaluation and contemplation to bring you out of that confusion.  It's okay to be confused.  I am definitely not saying that it is bad but I think that often people (including myself) are so concerned with not being seen as ignorant that we miss opportunities to acquire knowledge.  If it is knowledge that you seek then it is probably best not to try to be the most knowledgeable person in the room.  Now I will warn that if you seek knowledge you should be careful as to which knowledge you acquire and from where you acquire it.  There are agents out there that will corrupt you and your mind.  Thus you are back at square one>>>>>>>CONFUSION!!

So what does all this mean?  Sure things are complicated but when it becomes you're reasoning behind why you think, you act, and feel the way that you do then it's a result of mess/ignorance.  We all have it and the only way to rid yourself of it is to sort through it.  Complication should never be an excuse.  It should only be stated as a fact and once you know that it is a fact then you know what you have to do to clear it up.  Unless of course you are happy being complicated then by all means live and be happy.

Goal this week:  Simplify, reduce, and sort it out (in all categories).

Healthy Social Circle

"A true friend sees the good in everything, and brings out the best in the worst of things"

Sasha Azevedo 

About two weeks ago I went to lunch with an acquaintance who I hadn't seen in a while until  she contacted me this past month to set up a lunch date.  I was a little suspicious initially because her reasoning behind the invite was to get clarification.  Basically, she wanted to know why we were no longer friends.  The situation/friendship itself was toxic to say the least so when it came to me cleansing myself and surroundings of negative entities (something I'll discuss later as it's vital to a balanced life)  all unhealthy relationships had to go also.

"Misery loves company."

John Ray

Your mental, physical, spiritual, and social health is of utmost importance.  Cleansing your social circle and cultivating a healthy circle of friends is necessary if you want to obtain a balanced life.  If your friends are negative and disrespectful then it's going to affect you either directly or indirectly.  Others who are looking at you will ultimately believe that you are also negative and disrespectful.  You have to separate yourself from those types of people.  If getting you involved with their most recent bout of drama is their primary goal in every conversation then you have to assess if they're friends that are worth keeping.  Your interactions with those around you (especially friends) should leave you with an uplifting feeling.  If a relationship does not give you the support that you need then you should consider distancing yourself from those people and those types of situations.  People who are miserable are comparable to crabs they will grab onto you and try to pull you down with them. 
  

"Inhale peace, exhale excellence"

Unknown

When we take in positive energy we do more good for ourselves and others.  This is what I had to explain to my friend at lunch.  Her issues and the way she handled them were what made me decide to distance myself and end communication with her.   We all have problems and issues that may arise but generally when they come about we look for ways to fix them.  However, some people only use those problems and issues to add to their already abundant cluster of mess.  Drama is entertaining to them.  They need that in order to feel as though they are living fulfilling lives.  It's awful and twisted because no matter what advice or how many solutions you give them they will only find something murkier and more damaging to submerge themselves in.  You would be wasting your energy, time, and intelligence on people who never had any intentions on getting better.  In essence, you would only be depleting yourself.  That is energy that could be put into accomplishing something that is actually attainable.  Don't kill yourself trying to help those who don't want to be helped.

  

Letting go is hard and it's uncomfortable.  No one wants to be told that they did not make the cut.  I know some people who I distanced myself from that are now my enemies.  Though I think that if one of my friends told me that our relationship was unhealthy I would be upset at first but ultimately that threat of losing a friend would trigger some self evaluation.  The friends that I have are people that I truly care about so I will do some soul searching to see if what I do or how I behave as it pertains to our relationship is actually detrimental.  If it is then some change needs to happen and if not then we can both go our separate ways and just know that we were headed down two different avenues.  Friendships should never leave you feeling empty.