"A true friend sees the good in everything, and brings out the best in the worst of things"
Sasha Azevedo
About two weeks ago I went to lunch with an acquaintance who I hadn't seen in a while until she contacted me this past month to set up a lunch date. I was a little suspicious initially because her reasoning behind the invite was to get clarification. Basically, she wanted to know why we were no longer friends. The situation/friendship itself was toxic to say the least so when it came to me cleansing myself and surroundings of negative entities (something I'll discuss later as it's vital to a balanced life) all unhealthy relationships had to go also.
"Misery loves company."
John Ray
Your mental, physical, spiritual, and social health is of utmost importance. Cleansing your social circle and cultivating a healthy circle of friends is necessary if you want to obtain a balanced life. If your friends are negative and disrespectful then it's going to affect you either directly or indirectly. Others who are looking at you will ultimately believe that you are also negative and disrespectful. You have to separate yourself from those types of people. If getting you involved with their most recent bout of drama is their primary goal in every conversation then you have to assess if they're friends that are worth keeping. Your interactions with those around you (especially friends) should leave you with an uplifting feeling. If a relationship does not give you the support that you need then you should consider distancing yourself from those people and those types of situations. People who are miserable are comparable to crabs they will grab onto you and try to pull you down with them.
"Inhale peace, exhale excellence"
Unknown
When we take in positive energy we do more good for ourselves and others. This is what I had to explain to my friend at lunch. Her issues and the way she handled them were what made me decide to distance myself and end communication with her. We all have problems and issues that may arise but generally when they come about we look for ways to fix them. However, some people only use those problems and issues to add to their already abundant cluster of mess. Drama is entertaining to them. They need that in order to feel as though they are living fulfilling lives. It's awful and twisted because no matter what advice or how many solutions you give them they will only find something murkier and more damaging to submerge themselves in. You would be wasting your energy, time, and intelligence on people who never had any intentions on getting better. In essence, you would only be depleting yourself. That is energy that could be put into accomplishing something that is actually attainable. Don't kill yourself trying to help those who don't want to be helped.
Letting go is hard and it's uncomfortable. No one wants to be told that they did not make the cut. I know some people who I distanced myself from that are now my enemies. Though I think that if one of my friends told me that our relationship was unhealthy I would be upset at first but ultimately that threat of losing a friend would trigger some self evaluation. The friends that I have are people that I truly care about so I will do some soul searching to see if what I do or how I behave as it pertains to our relationship is actually detrimental. If it is then some change needs to happen and if not then we can both go our separate ways and just know that we were headed down two different avenues. Friendships should never leave you feeling empty.
